“This is the true joy of life. To be used for a purpose, recognized by yourself as powerful; to be completely worn out before you are thrown on the scrap heap; to be a force of nature rather than a small feverish lump of things and grievances complaining that the world will not dedicate itself to making you happy”.
George Bernard Shaw
I don’t know about you, but I’m with George Bernard Shaw. On my deathbed I want to feel completely exhausted, confident that I took every opportunity that came my way and committed myself to life to the fullest, striving to make the most of every moment of every day.
I would hate to look back on my life and think ‘Oh, if only… if only… if only’
But unfortunately, if I ask the question now: – ‘Have I committed myself to life to the fullest extent possible?’ The answer would be no.
Many times throughout my life I have held back out of fear. Many times throughout my life I have lived for something that is yet to come. Many times throughout my life I have struggled through difficult times waiting, waiting, waiting… For what?
No matter what I do now, I can’t go back and change the past. But I can change the way I feel about it and I can CHOOSE to recreate my future every day in every moment.
Fundamental to all this is how I see the world. Is it a place of support or a place of obstruction? And – Do I have any power to change things?
If you’ve been reading these blogs for a while or have seen any of my books or the website, you probably already know that I believe the world is an infinitely caring place and that I have the power to change my reality by changing my beliefs and intentions. .
I like this equation to describe life:-
Belief + Intention = Creation
I also like to think that ‘I believe, therefore I am’.
However, within all this, I have realized that there is an underlying current of thoughts, feelings and beliefs that we are not always aware of. WE THINK we are in control, but with a little analysis we find that our conscious mind is only a very small part of our total being.
As well as our conscious mind believing and creating our reality. Our subconscious mind and our unconscious mind are doing the same thing. Hence the reason why we sometimes create repetitive patterns in our lives.
There are some lessons that we simply cannot avoid. Some truths we just can’t hide from. Some experiences that we simply must have in this life. Maybe we should call this fate? Or the fate?
The point is that sometimes these things happen to us, whether we like it or not. Whether we intend them consciously or not.
However, the beauty of life, the richness of life, is that it is uncontrollable and unpredictable. That means unexpected and unpredictable GOOD things also happen to us (read ‘The Magic Box’ for more on that).
Recognizing the benefit of moving away from the illusion that we are in control creates a space for magical things to happen.
The Self-Mastery Program aims to provide the tools and techniques that gradually allow you to access a freer way of life. One that frees you from fears, anxieties and doubts and allows you to come to a place where you can look back and say ‘Yes, I committed myself to life to the fullest, whether they were good times or bad, I always made the most of them. live for the moment, never live for tomorrow.
The goal of this Blog is to provide ideas, tools, and techniques that will allow you to change your beliefs and therefore change the world.
So – practical application time.
Are you up for a challenge?
The challenge, if you choose to accept it, is to stop complaining for a month.
Yes, that’s right, WITHOUT COMPLAINING, about anything.
So if someone cuts you off on the freeway while you’re driving to work, DON’T COMPLAIN. If you burn your toast in the morning, DON’T COMPLAIN. If your wife/husband/partner/lover forgets YOUR birthday, yes, you guessed it, DON’T COMPLAIN.
No – ‘Oh poor me, why is this happening to me?’
No – ‘What’s wrong with you why did you do that to me?’
Not even – ‘I’m having a BAD day’
NO COMPLAINTS – NOTHING – ZIP – NOTHING
To understand?
WHY? I hear you scream…
Ok, good question.
The word ‘Complain’ comes from the Latin word ‘Plangere’ – to hit or hit. It is added to the intensive prefix ‘com’ – with. Its meaning developed metaphorically ‘Beating one’s chest’ – or ‘com-plangere’ – ‘with a beating’.
Ha ha, are you laughing already?
Complaint – hitting oneself!!!
‘Oh poor me!’ Of course.
So would it be too obtuse of me to suggest that complaining is actually punishing ourselves?
If so, I don’t know about you, but I’m over it and I really want to erase it from my life.
But just a little more digging first.
Where does it come from? For what purpose would we learn to beat ourselves up?
Think for a moment about how you feel when you complain, I mean really whine at someone…
Try doing it while hitting yourself in the chest for great effect.
‘You will never believe what happened to me today! On the way to work I was minding my own business when this rude and arrogant person almost ran me out of the way. I blew my horn at him, but he just turned around and handed me the bird (one finger salute, a rude gesture for those of you unfamiliar with western sensibilities…) can you believe it? Then I pulled into the parking lot at work and someone had parked in my spot! I had to park three levels down and then carry all my presentation stuff up the stairs. And do you think someone would help me? Nope! Of course not! People looked at me struggling and then looked away. Some people’s nerve! How dare they! Then I walk in the door to find that the meeting has moved to another meeting room on a different floor, so I have to pack up all my stuff again and walk around until I find it. Finally, I find it and go inside only to find that the meeting has already started. My boss just looked at me and shook his head. Why do things like this always happen to me?
Translation.
‘I am a victim. I have no power to change or influence my reality. All I can do is complain about what I am receiving in the hope that someone, somewhere will listen to me and release me from this hell. More than that, I’m addicted to the chemicals that are released in my brain when I complain and I really need you to say ‘poor thing. How could they do those things to you? How can they be so mean to you? and maybe even promise that in some dark alley on a cold night you could come out of the shadows and slap them in the face just to teach them a lesson. That way, it gives me the attention I so badly need, but at the same time traps me in a victim mentality.’
And the origin?
Return your mind to being a small child. Could you speak? No. So how did you get noticed? you yelled And who rescued you? Mom or dad. And how did you feel then?
Complaining is rooted in the helplessness of the childlike human form. As babies, we cannot walk, talk, feed, or hold ourselves in any way. Left to our own devices, we’d be dead pretty quick.
Beating our chests and complaining back then was a very good strategy.
Carried into our adulthood it becomes a burden.
So are you a victim or a warrior?
A victim believes that she has no power and can only make a lot of noise and hopes that someone else will rescue her. They are a passenger on the journey of life.
A warrior believes that he can influence the world. They see every obstacle as a challenge to overcome. They know the world is a mystery they can’t hope to understand, but they keep trying anyway. They trust that what they are receiving right now is right for them right now. They know that everything is ALWAYS perfect, no matter how horrible things may seem right now.
So try the challenge. Try not to complain for 30 days. Take note of what you complain about. Who do you complain to and what do you really get out of it? Then erase him from your life and choose to step up and take responsibility instead.
Then see how life changes.