If you look at the most successful people, you will see that they all have one thing in common: self-confidence. Yes, some people are born with it, but for most people, it’s a learned skill.
Here are my top tips for boosting your confidence:
1. Work on your body language.
We’ve all been in places where someone quite normal walks into a room, makes eye contact, and starts to impress everyone. Or where you think someone is at least 6 feet tall because of their bearing and the way they carry themselves and then you realize they’re pretty average.
Like it or not, first impressions count. So stand tall and practice good posture. Imagine that you are being pulled by a rope that goes from your toes to the top of your head. And every time you walk into a room, don’t do it almost apologetically. Walk in, make eye contact and be the first to introduce yourself.
2. Get involved in a physical activity: walking, swimming, etc.
Any physical exercise such as walking, running, dancing, etc. it will make you feel better about yourself. First of all, exercise releases all those good hormones and then your body image will improve as you get fitter.
3. Wear clothes that fit you well.
In the past, I’ve made the mistake of trying to hide my body flaws by wearing baggy clothes. Do you have? The truth is, wearing clothes that don’t fit well only serves to accentuate the areas you’re trying to cover. Those big, baggy tops aren’t doing most women any favors. In fact, they make you look even bigger.
Sometimes we get into a pair of jeans (the right size) but they look terrible because of the cut. It is much better to buy a larger size and be comfortable. It’s the fit, not the size, that matters.
4. Be kind to yourself.
Think about the things you say to yourself when you make a mistake. Would you say those same things to your friends? Probably not. When we make mistakes, we are often very hard on ourselves. However, we treat other people much, much better. The next time this happens, stop and start talking to yourself like you would a friend.
5. Frequently remind yourself of your good qualities.
Do you know what your best qualities are? Are you kind and compassionate? Do you treat people fairly? Are you a friendly person? Do you like helping people?
Make a list of at least five good qualities and remind yourself of them every day, but especially when you have a bad day.
6. Don’t dwell on your past mistakes.
Recognize that error does not define who you are. You can fail an exam without failing. Your relationship may have gone overboard, but that doesn’t mean you’re a failure.
Keep things in perspective. it just means you failed the exam or that the relationship it has failed.
7. Surround yourself with people who support you.
The last thing you need when you’re feeling down or less than fabulous is to be surrounded by naysayers and negative people telling you that “all men suck” or “it’s impossible to get the job you’re looking for.”
Choose carefully who you share your heart with and surround yourself with people who encourage and motivate people. If you don’t have many of those in your life, then contact me and I’ll be your cheerleader!
8. Keep learning new skills
In addition to keeping your mind sharp (and preventing Alzheimer’s), be a lifelong learner. I am not necessarily referring to formal education.
What’s stopping you from learning a new language, taking a dance class, learning new computer skills, starting blogging, etc? Learning will improve your confidence by leaps and bounds.
9. Take the time to reach out to other people through community programs, etc.
If you ever feel down, there is nothing better than helping other people. Volunteer your services at a children’s orphanage or nursing home.
My challenge to you is this: the next time you eat at a restaurant, instead of sending half your food to the kitchen, grab a doggy bag and give it to the panhandler on the nearest corner. Your appreciation will melt the hardest hearts.
10 learn to defend yourself
Your soul dies a little bit every time you shut up when you should speak for yourself. Being a doormat is unattractive and won’t get you anywhere in the long run.
If you haven’t had much practice before, start small. Insist on low-fat milk in your coffee. Return milk that has turned sour before the expiration date. Write a letter of complaint if you receive poor customer service. And only when you feel more confident, tackle bigger issues, like talking to your boss about overloading you with work, or to your friends about relationship problems.
Learn to say no. It’s not a swear word, I promise.