One of the great mental health scourges of our time is loneliness. The world has never been more populated and connected; still, it’s like we’re walking alone.
Religious leaders like to blame technology for this. If everyone got rid of their smartphones, everything would be fine.
Regarding them, they are wrong.
This is not a technology problem. It runs much deeper.
Humans evolved to belong to tribes. Nobody could be a great hunter-gatherer alone: it made sense to form a team, divide the work and specialize.
Even if you could forage for yourself, you couldn’t have children that way. If you didn’t belong to a tribe, your genes would eventually die out.
Today we carry that instinct with us.
The problem is that we don’t need close-knit communities to survive. You can work alongside people you barely know, buy groceries from strangers, and pay your bills to faceless corporations.
You can survive without feeling that someone needs you.
And this is how you can feel lonely while surrounded by people.
Once you know that, the solution will appear before you: find a tribe that appreciates you.
There is something strange and powerful about finding Your People. A group of people who “get you” can make a difference in your life.
There’s the loneliness side of things, of course. Belonging can make you happy, happier than you’ve felt in a long time.
It can also be useful in more practical ways.
The more people you know, and who like, trust and respect you, the easier life becomes.
Do you need a place to stay for a night or two?
Looking for a new job?
After any advice or guidance?
The bigger and better your tribes are, the more likely you are to find what you need.
That’s why you should find a new tribe. Let’s talk about how.
You can make a list of everything you are and do. Maybe you like politics, gardening, movies, and supporting the local community. That’s at least four tribes right there, probably a lot more.
Find groups of people excited about each of these. There are probably many within a stone’s throw. After all, you’re not the only one looking for connection.
What if you can’t find the group you want?
Consider starting one.
Find out the purpose of the group, capture it in a little spiel, and start promoting it online or at a community center. Chances are you’re not the only one with your interests.