I love the synchronicity of the universe. They always remind me to come back to the present moment. This morning I felt restless even after a silent meditation and daily reading inspirational message. I decided to get some exercise and take my pup for a bike ride. As I was riding my bike down a winding country road, basking in the warmth of the sun and the shade of the great canopy of trees, out of nowhere a shiny black car passed by with a Hawaiian license plate that read “FL GOOD.” Now, at that very moment, I had been listening through my headphones to a guided meditation on Insight Timer on my iPhone. The narrator of the meditation had just finished saying in his deep and peaceful Australian voice, “Breathe, relax and feel good.” I smiled as I recognized the connection between the guided meditation and the car message. I felt my body relax and I remembered that there is no need to be anywhere other than here, and that I don’t need to escape from life, my feelings or my mind. Instead, I simply need to befriend them and allow myself to feel good, and be fully in the moment. I stopped worrying about the future and felt a stillness rise up from deep within me.
I then considered the various ways I escape the moment because I find it too painful, too scary, too unfamiliar, or too boring. Netflix, food, FB, and focusing on other people’s problems instead of my own are ways I sometimes put life aside and miss the present moment. Even meditation or overwork can become an unhealthy escape if I overuse them to avoid entering the emptiness of my soul that wants to be filled with love. This pattern of escaping from the painful or frightening present moment started when I was a child. My friend’s daughter proves this point.
Yesterday Alicia, a good friend of mine, shared with me that her 10-year-old daughter, Holly, is addicted to audible books. I found myself saying, “Well that’s not so bad, better than videos and TV.” But she then shook her head and said sadly, “No, you don’t understand, she doesn’t even want to tell me about her day or talk on the way home from school, she just wants to get into the fantasy world.” of her stories. And a story is never enough, it always has to have more and more books. She even falls asleep while listening to them.” I then asked her about the contents of the books. She informed me that they are positive stories of fairy tale heroes and characters. “Then why is it so bad?” I asked. Alicia replied quickly that her daughter was missing out on the precious present moments of life, friends and family, and more importantly, discovering her own thoughts and feelings.
Then I realized that she was right. Anything we overuse to take us away from this reality and present moment can detract from our full vitality, feelings, and intuition. As with Holly, while an occasional audiobook can be uplifting and fun, the addictive need to have one after another indicates that there is a deeper issue at work. Alicia went on to tell me that her daughter is having a hard time making friends at her new school and with the content of the material in fifth grade. The pain of loneliness and the sense of failure are perhaps too much for Holly, hence her escape into books.
Our minds can be very difficult places to navigate. I think maybe a survival mechanism has been built in that says, “Escape! Get out! Get out now!” when our pain threshold is too high. How we choose to follow the directive to evacuate is up to us. Today, I’m more likely to get out in nature and exercise or call a friend and talk about what’s going on inside my crazy brain rather than revert to old, outdated, or dysfunctional modes of escape. I got lucky today and chose a guided meditation to bring me back to peace, and that was enforced with an impromptu feel-good message from a passing car. When I live in the present moment, life is never too much to deal with and synchronicities can occur.